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Review
Praise for How We Love “How We Love has the capacity to change not only your marriage but every relationship that’s important in your life.” –Josh McDowell, Christian apologist, evangelist, and author of more than seventy-five books including More Than a Carpenter and Evidence that Demands a Verdict “The authors have translated the complexity of how we love into a highly readable and clearly written book. Couples will easily be able to identify their love styles and how to transform them into genuine love. I recommend it to all couples.” –Harville Hendrix, PHD, therapist and educator with over twenty-five years of experience, cofounder and president of the Institute for Imago Relationship Therapy, and author of Getting the Love You Want “Milan and Kay bring us a fresh look at intimacy and how we learn to love. Their practical and personal approach will enrich anyone’s marriage.” –Daivd Stoop, PHD, psychologist and author of When Couples Pray Together “I found How We Love to be extremely enlightening: a discovery of how best to love my wife, how to nurture her through a better understanding of our love styles, and how to implement change.” –Phil Waugh, executive director of Covenant Marriage Movement “I have had the joy and privilege of working with Milan and Kay on a professional level and have been amazed at the success of their therapeutic techniques. Understanding our love styles and taking down the walls created by our imprints are skills that can help every marriage. I am thrilled that more couples will learn how to strengthen their relationships through the tools described in this book.” –Dr. Elizabeth John, MD, psychiatrist “Milan and Kay have taken their own life experience, their research over the years, and their experience in the counseling office, and distilled it into a work that is rigorous, original, and understandable. If you want to strengthen and enrich your marriage, as well as grow personally, I strongly encourage you to read and digest this material. The effect on all your relationships will be powerful.” –Dr. Jim Masteller, executive director of the Center for Individual and Family Therapy “Through Milan and Kay’s candid stories you will learn your own love style, find how to connect more deeply with your spouse, and ultimately realize who you were meant to be at the core of your being.” –Greg Campbell, retired business executive “Forget everything external you think defines you. The quality of your relationships and your contributions to them are what make life great or miserable. This book is a key to a world of insight into intimacy only you can bring to your relationships. With each page, I felt Milan and Kay had seen my movie! My marriage is different today because of the simple, profound help I discovered in these pages.” –Kenny Luck, author of Risk and Every Man, God’s Man, men’s pastor at Saddleback Church, and founder of Every Man Ministries “The Yerkoviches have taken important developmental and psychological concepts and given them to us in a user-friendly fashion. They give us a peek into their personal journey and the countless people they have helped move from young hurts toward more meaningful intimate attachment. How We Love helps us see ourselves more clearly and understand our roles in the impasses of our relationships.…A practical and impactful read for all!” –Jill Hubbard, PHD, clinical psychologist, cohost of New Life Live! national radio program, speaker, and full-time mom “I am excited that Milan and Kay have given us the guiding principles of a successful marriage. With candor and uncommon insight they have demystified the issues in relationships that cause so many couples to get stuck. This book will get the wheels rolling and provide a destination filled with hope, healing, and fulfillment.” –Dr. Mick Ukeja, president of LeadershipTraq and chair of the Governing Council of the Ukleja Center for Ethical Leadership
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About the Author
Milan and Kay Yerkovich are marriage counselors with decades of experience. Milan is a cohost of New Life Live! with Stephen Arterburn. He holds a master’s degree in biblical studies and is the founder of the counseling center Relationship 180. Kay has a master’s degree in counseling and focuses on helping couples create healthy attachment. Together Milan and Kay have developed a method of couples therapy called Attachment Core Pattern Therapy. The Yerkoviches are the parents of four adult children. They make their home in southern California.
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Product details
Paperback: 352 pages
Publisher: WaterBrook; Expanded edition (July 11, 2017)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0735290172
ISBN-13: 978-0735290174
Product Dimensions:
5.9 x 0.9 x 8.9 inches
Shipping Weight: 13.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.7 out of 5 stars
475 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#3,773 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
My wife and I help people walk through some tough times, usually we help them process what they've read in books or workbooks. We've found this to be the most profound, emotionally and spiritually healing books and workbooks to date. It's concepts shape the way my wife and I interact, how we interact with others (children and adults, family, friends, co-workers), and how we interact with our maker.This book can uncover some pretty messed up stuff in you that you didn't know was there, and I know first hand that can be scary. You'll get the most out of this book if you give yourself some serious alone time to read and truly process the first 3 chapters. Going through this with your spouse makes the process ever more satisfying as you not only learn more about how and why you respond the way you do, you'll likely see your spouse in a way that you've never seen before.Spouse or not, this one can truly help you in all relationships.
I have only begun to read the book but I didn't see anywhere in the product description that the workbook was included in this book so I ordered that separately. I wasted the money spent on the work book because the book includes the workbook in the back. Better advertising needed.
I was so impressed by this book I bought, 8, eight more to give out to family. I am going to utilize the tools inorder to learn how to have a healthy relationship with not only my husband but everyone I love. Even bought two books on relationships with children to help me with my relationship skills with my grandchildren and giving the other to my daughter. Very grateful to finally find the tools to repair the unhealthy habits I learned as a child.
This is the first book I have found that presents a practical & detailed method of self-help for troubled couples. It can be understood and used by anybody without studies in psychology. The book provides just the right amount of theory, a good understandable typology of inefffective love styles, and a fairly detailed workbook for couples to actually do the repair work.This is not a book to read: it is a book to learn, reflect on, and use as a practical guide to improve emotional connection and happiness in you marriage. The book must ideally be read and studied by both husband and wife together. However, in those cases where only one spouse is willing to make the effort of learning the book's content, I highly recommend that this one spouse makes the effort alone, and then device a strategy to bring the other on board. This book has the potential to be life changing for those couples who are prepared to put in the considerable effort required to improve the relationship. But the payoff is huge! It's worth the effort.
Best self-improvement book I've ever read. I feel that every newly married couple should read this. It was amazing how my love style was described and explained to me. I felt like someone looked right into my heart. I've never had anyone or any counselor describe my personality type/love style like the Yerkovichs. Reading this book has helped me tremendously; I could hardly put it down. I don't feel so alone anymore because there are others out there just like me. I've learned so much about myself and different things I can do to help myself. I am so thankful that God put the task of writing this book on the Yerkovichs' hearts. I thank you both so very much. And I just have to say thank you to Focus on the Family because without them, I would not have known about this book. I am so glad the Yerkovichs took the time to do the broadcast with them.
This book is in marriage game changer! Excellent insights from a couple who recognized how their marriage of 15 years what is quickly going downhill. The premise of the book is recognizing that we all come from different backgrounds in families of origin. In that way you learn what love is… A lack of love or lavish love, or anything in between. But we learn what love is from all backgrounds and then we take that information into our marriages. This can create lots of stress as there is lots of misunderstandings in the couples way of giving and receiving love. Different from love languages! But extremely valuable information! I highly recommend it!
Bought this on recomendation from someone at bible study. Can save you $$ on marriage counseling. Identifies areas which are ruining your marriage you had no idea figured in. Also stated very lovingly so no partner can say, "It's YOUR fault". We are ALL imprinted with less than ideal traits with which we love our mate no matter how good of a childhood we had. Take the quiz, read the book, identify your love type and work through how to change. With guidance on how to change ingrained habits there is hope for failing marriages. The Yerkovich's lifelong work is a well kept secret. Let's change that! You will not be disappointed.
Loooove this book and would recommend it to any one in a relationship (marriage, friendship, family). If you want to know why you connect/behave towards people the way you do and why people connect/behave towards you the way they do especially where conflict is prevalent, then this book is a MUST read. Milan and Kay using God's principles help you to unravel the source/root of problems when we struggle in relating to one another such as injured imprints that disrupt a relationship, understanding how our love style affects the other, breaking free of negative patterns and more to create a deeper, healthier, loving relationship.I bought this for my struggling marriage and though I was alone in my discovery (my husband was not willing) it has helped me understand the dynamics of my marriage. You receive the optimum treasures this book has to offer when both parties are involved.
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